Whelp, I Guess I’m Going to Work Tomorrow; or, Another Day I Didn’t Win the Lottery

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I blame every inspirational poster ever created for the following blog post…

So the other night, in the midst of several stress dreams about work, I had one that gave me pause.

First and foremost can we please discuss how horrible stress dreams about work are? First off- one dream I had just last night had to do with a job that I haven’t worked at in almost 6 years. How annoying is that?

According to the first result that popped up when I took to Google for an answer, it could related to having unfinished business with that position or that I’m holding on too much to things from my past. Interesting.

Is’ like to think that maybe it has to do with my working on my book and writing about certain things from that particular period of my life?

Who the hell knows.

Worse is having stress dreams about my current job. Since I’m working two jobs at the moment, I tend to flux between the two. I’ll dream that I’m on the road about to get up in front of an audience but for some reason I don’t have a presentation ready and they’re all there and I can’t get anything to work and everything is the worst and I just want to curl up and die.

My brain. Gotta love it.

I’ll also have dreams about the restaurant. Most of the time I’m insanely busy and there’s this one table that for some reason I can’t get to and everything is going horribly wrong and I’m just the worst waiter ever!

A lot of times when I’m dreaming about the grocery store (a job I left in 2011 after 10 and a half years working there) it has to do with trying to close the store. I would lock the doors but for some reason they’d become unlocked and people would keep flooding into the store and I’d be fighting to get them to leave so we could close but they just kept coming.

This is a strange reality at the restaurant in a way. The other night people just kept coming in right before close. Policy is, we sit people right up until we lock the doors. I was the closer and I ended up with 8 tables (around 20+ people) all at once. It was miserable.

JOSH WHAT THE HELL DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH INSPIRATIONAL POSTERS AND THE LOTTERY? THIS POST IS A HOT MESS OF NONSENSE.

Welcome to my day? Seriously, I open word two hours ago to write this post and I’m nowhere near actually started and I’ve already written almost 500 words.

People wonder why I’m still not done writing my book.

I have issues.

Holy shit I just hit two pages and I haven’t gotten to the point!

This is why I’m single.

Anyway.

So the other night I had a dream that I won the lottery. Specifically I has won 8 million dollars on a scratch ticket.

Now that seems like the world’s most random amount but I went with it.

I decided I needed to try my luck and as it happened I had some “extra” cash lying around.

During this last summer we were having a sale contest at the restaurant. Each time you hit a milestone sale (like 5 margaritas or something) you won a scratch ticket. Over the course of the contest, I earned several scratchers and a few of them were winners. These tickets then sat in my book forever and eventually ended up in the center console of my car.

I stumbled upon them while cleaning the same day I had the lottery dream. I decided it was time to try my luck with my $9.00 in winnings.

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Apparently I talk like Erica’s grandmother. Thanks group chat.

It then took me three days to actually cash in the tickets and buy another one because I’m me. Hell, I could barely get this damn post started.

Can I just say though, that the three days of dreaming leading up to buying the ticket were pretty much the best?

Right now is a big time of lottery dreams for a lot of people. The Powerball is up to an insane amount and people are making sure to try their luck. I’m not a gambler at all but I may just give it a go tonight, why not!

What’s funny is how my dreams of winning have changed as I’ve gotten older. I don’t even need 400 Million (current Powerball jackpot) or even the 8 million I dreamt of. In reality I, like most people, would love just enough money to not have to worry about money. I don’t even need enough to last me a lifetime. I’d just really like to hit the reset button on my finances.

Mortgage? Goodbye! Car payments? Adios!

I’m still paying, out of pocket, for the series of surgeries I had to have on my leg last summer. There’s credit cards and other assorted life things that’d I’d really love to not worry about.

And so I let myself dream.

I honestly thought of how awesome it would be to write one big fat check to pay for my house. It’d be the same feeling I had when I demolished my life savings to pay off my student loans once and for all but like, a lot bigger.

So I went today and turned in my scratch tickets from last year for a total of $9.00. I threw in $1.00 of my own to buy a ten dollar scratcher.

I didn’t win.

Anything.

At all.

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My losing ticket. 

What’s funny is I didn’t get that horrible sinking feeling of disappointment I thought I would upon learning that I just wasted money. Well, technically $1.00 since I didn’t buy those other tickets. I mean, I could have walked away $9.00 richer but what are you gonna do.

But I can’t help but wonder what that dream could have meant.

BACK TO GOOGLE!

Here’s what I found:

Dreaming that you are playing or that you win the lottery means you will be able to change your lifestyle and do something better with your life.

That good feeling of dreaming of winning? Still hanging around.

There are many things I’m looking to accomplish this year. One big thing has been working on this here blog and finding success in blogging, whatever that may be. I’m also working as hard as possible to finish my book and get it out there to the world.

So maybe today isn’t the day I became a millionaire and tomorrow I’m gonna have to get up and go wait some tables but maybe that means something bigger is on the horizon. I’m gonna keep my hopes high and work my butt off more than ever before to reach my goals.

ALL THE INSPIRATION!

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Guinness is indifferent to me not being a millionaire… Lemon silently judges in the background…

P.S. It was brought to my attention that I did not explain my apparent vendetta against inspirational posters. I’m simply harping on the “Chase your dreams” posters that people seem to love. I chased that dream, now I have a $10 losing scratch ticket and NOT 8 Million Dollars like I was promised. So there’s that.

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